“My English is good, still I fumble when I speak with anyone.”
What can be more painful, hurtful, and frustrating than this? Even when you have a good command of Grammar, vocabulary pronunciation, then too you usually, get stuck, nervous, scared, or lack confidence, when you speak in front of a group of people. Do you wish there would have been some powerful tricks to overcome these negative feelings and this huge problem of fumbling?
I am Surabhi Jain, a Career Communication Coach. I am the founder of Fearless Communicators Tribe. In past 6 years, I have helped thousands of people to achieve success in their career by developing their communication skills. I am on a mission to help a hundred thousand people to achieve growth in their professional and personal lives, enhancing the spoken English skills.
Although I studied in an English medium convent school, I found myself struggling with grammar, pronunciation, vocabulary, ideas and words, when it came to speaking in front of my peers, colleagues, friends, acquaintances and family members, in English.
Reasons
I realized that there are certain reasons due to which we tend to fumble when we speak in English
- Translation
Generally, when we are talking, we tend to translate from English to native language, when the person is speaking and then the native language to English, when we have to respond. Now, this translation takes some time. Usually, the window we have, to respond, is of 10 to 20 seconds. If you don’t speak during this time it is considered fumbling.
- Vocabulary
Most of us have a habit of maintaining a vocabulary bank, a meticulous list of all the amazing and beautiful words. They can be hundred, 500, thousand, or even more. That’s one awesome habit. But how many times do we actually use this list? Do we put these words, phrases or expressions, into use? Collecting is good but you also need to spend some. Develop a habit of spending these words every now and then. Use them regularly. Remember, ‘The muscles are not built when you are in the ring.’ When you try to incorporate those fancy vocabulary words while speaking, forcefully, intentionally, your efforts show. It’s pretty obvious that you are not very comfortable and it results in fumbling
- Grammar
Grammar is the biggest culprit. Throughout our lives, we try to recall the definitions and apply the rules, when they want to speak and this is one major constraint or hurdle when it comes to speaking English. The response has to be quick. There is no time to apply the rules when you are actually speaking.
All these years, I tried many things to find a solution to this problem. I am sharing 7 easy, doable Hacks which I practice myself and also suggest to my students. However, before going to the solutions let us understand, why is it important to avoid fumbling while speaking English?
Why to avoid Fumbling?
- Engagement
Whenever you are speaking to someone if you fumble, stutter, or stammer, the person may feel distracted. He will not give 100% attention to you because his focus will be shifted from your emotions and message to the fillers which you might be using. For instance, you know, okay, uh, umm, like, et. If we need the complete undiverted attention, if we need the audience engagement it is important that we try not to fumble.
- Empathy
Empathy is the ability to showcase a better understanding of whatever the person is telling you. Suppose if you fumble while responding to what the other person has said, the person might feel that you have not understood or you are not responding wholeheartedly. It will create a wrong impression.
- Connectivity
If you fumble a lot, take long pauses, use a lot of fillers, somewhere it will break the connectivity. The listener or the audience may lose track of your message. You may not be able to make people feel, think or act the way you wanted. The entire essence of your message will be lost.
- Understanding
If the listener or the audience finds it difficult to understand what you are trying to say, the message may go wrong or it may be completely altered. If you are fumbling a lot the listener may not be willing to take the action. Your speech or talk, your efforts may go absolutely waste and you don’t want that.
How to avoid fumbling while speaking English?
- Relax- Breathe, Pause, Go slow
Relax it is very important to keep your body and mind relaxed when you are communicating. You can do this in three ways:
- Breathe– Whenever you feel anxiety or nervousness, take a deep breath. Now, this breathing should not be so loud, that it is audible to the person whom you are speaking with or to the audience if you are on stage. Take a deep breath, but not audible enough. It calms down your nerves.
- Pause– It’s scientifically proven that your mind can think 400 to 1600 words per minute, depending on person to person. While an average adult human being can speak approximately 150 words per minute. Due to this difference if you take a pause it may seem like a long silence to you. Though, pauses have a magical effect on your speech. It helps in two ways. It gives you some time to think of what to speak next, to collect your thoughts and words in your mind. It gives time to the audience, it is time for the person whom you are speaking to absorb your content to absorb your thoughts and ideas. It’s a Win-Win situation
- Go slow– Don’t speak too fast. If you speak really fast, there are two problems. Your words may not be very clear, so the listen or may have to strain himself to understand you properly. The other is, if you are going too fast, you will soon be exhausted of the ideas and content and then there will be a long silence after that. You don’t want to do that. So, it’s important to speak at a casual pace neither too fast nor too slow, so as to put the listener to sleep. It should be at a casual pace
- Listen actively- Active, Understand, To the context
It is very important to listen properly to what the other person is saying. You need to be an active listener. You need to comprehend what he wants to tell you. It is significant to decode what the person is speaking and answer in the same context. Also, When in a group, It is essential to speak in the context of the discussion, and for that, you need to listen properly before responding or reacting.
- Structure- Plan
Whenever you are answering, you need to structure your thoughts. You need to organize your speech properly and for that, it is important to plan your answer. This has to be done within very few seconds, you don’t have a lifetime to do all these things. For that you need to analyze- Whom am I speaking with? What is my relationship with the person? Whether it is the boss, a customer, a supplier, a family member senior or younger to you, or is it the teacher of your child or an unknown audience. What does the person want from you? What do you want from that person? How do you want him to feel, think or act? What kind of action do you want him to take?
- Be confident- Don’t Hesitate, Believe
It is really important to show confidence, even if you feel jittery or nervous. Remember, “ Fake it till you make it” Feel confident, believe in yourself. “Yes I can speak English. What is the big deal? It’s just a language and I know it very well.” Exhibit confidence when you are speaking with someone.
The next 3 hacks, which I am going to share, are how you need to build your muscles. As mentioned earlier, “Muscles are not built while in the ring.” These are the things which you need to do on daily basis as a routine.
- Content- Read, Listen
The first is collecting content and how are you going to do that? By content, I mean thoughts, ideas, suggestions in English itself. You can do this by reading and listening to English content. Lots and lots of English content.
- Notes- Ideas, Quotes, Vocabulary (words, phrases, metaphors), Examples, Stories (Personal, borrowed)
If you don’t have a habit of journaling, you can start making notes. They can be digital or handwritten in a notebook. You will end up collecting a lot of ideas, quotes, vocabulary, which includes words, phrases, idiomatic expressions, metaphors. Also, you may write down certain examples which are nothing but your observations, happenings around you. You can keep collecting stories too. The real-life stories. They can be your personal stories or they can be of the people around you. The people whom you know or the celebrities, personalities. You will never go out of ideas for speaking. One thing worth noting here is, only collecting things will not work, you need to use them every now and then.
- Practice- Mirror, Videos, Self Analysis
Practicing on a daily basis is a rule. You can practice in three ways:
Mirror practice- Stand in front of the mirror. Choose a topic and start speaking. Structure and plan it properly and just go about it. You can also go for a conversation, where you can try to speak for both the people.
Recording yourself- You can record your video while speaking. This the best way to practice. Imagine the camera lens to be your virtual audience and look straight into the camera lens while speaking.
Self analysis- How are you going to do self-analysis? For this, you need to watch your recording multiple times. Jot down certain points where you are going wrong, how many times you fumbled, where did I go blank, where did you use wrong pronunciation? Then, when you practice again, don’t forget to slash down the mistakes which you have corrected. This does not only help you to correct your mistakes but will also motivate you because you are diminishing on your mistakes every time.
So these are the 7 hacks that will help you to overcome fumbling. Keep practicing and mastering your English-speaking skills. After all, it’s just a language.
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